Reblog: Spring

I’m not keeping up with blog reading enough but a quick peek at the blogs I was following from starting my blog turned up this one. I really enjoyed watching the Sketchbook Skool video shared at this post. I was just posting about gardening intentions and seeds recently…I’d love to get round to drawing, must dig out materials then starts the garden…

BY's Art

This is how you do creative.  I came across the creative woman Jill Weber a couple months ago and I was so inspired by Jill’s creativity and passion for gardening and obviously life.  It made me want to do several things:  1. Watch it again.  2. Go draw something. 3. Thumb thru our seed catalog and plan our garden. 4. Thank God again for so many things that really make life rich.

We make life so very complicated yet producing shallow results.  I think my life’s motto has become:  “Nothing has changed, God is still longing for someone to just walk with Him  in a garden.”  Enjoy.  I especially liked the little wheel of seed growth!

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all in good time? …MLA (post intended 1st March!)

{This post was ready on 1st March. Human error: I seem to have only saved it to draft, and forgotten to publish. I can hardly believe it!}


happy new year!

(I’m being archaic, i know, but traditionally, the new year starts here, tomorrow, 1st March!)

And maybe, just for a change, I can join in with this in a timely manner…

Monthly Look Ahead challenge badge (original version) designed by challenge host Cool Beans 4 dot wordpress dot com

… on exactly the day the challenge response was intended – although challenge host CoolBeans  has always welcomed my efforts, been very nice about my lateness, sporadity, scatty sometimes hightly-strung expressions of self and circumstance and so forth…

If you should wish to join in, this month’s post to pingback/comment at can be found hereI hope it’s still ok for my using the outmoded, original version of the badge for this post. I love the new one too, but February is my special month for remembrance… so are April and November… if ok, I’ll maybe change up for summer, then revert for winter, or maybe I should stick with this colour, purple. That’s ssuming I’ll sustain blogging activity this phase round, and ever hopeful 🙂

I’m actually wondering how many things I’ve listed previously that I’ve still NOT done. And I will try and remember to capitalise my ‘i’ at all times in the remainder of this post but reserve the right to not edit the first -oops, and second, occurrences 😉

“Who said don’t look back?” I am definitely looking forward to listening to music more often and participating in the meditational activities of movement and deep abdominal muscle excercise and deep-breathing, airing my lungs via crooning along with ole crones fogies like … all sorts. Grunge. Especially.

I haven’t seen the film ‘Unrest’ yet – and really should given all the hype and promotional support that it’s still garnering. [bugbare#1] I missed it when it was showing at one of our local arts theatres – but then I saw nothing of the marketing to be aware it was even showing there until after the event. That particular venue’s ticket prices are usually steeped anyway and most people with my condition might not have been well enough to get out and see it either. When the DVD is for sale on Amazon then i’ll definitely buy it, but no way am I paying for streaming content that might alter or disappear from my hard-drive or suffer hardware breakdown and thus lose it and NO way am I inputting personal data to an unknown capitalist venture project’s website just cos they made the film! It all smacks of quite concerning dubiousness from the moment I ever saw mention of it. Perhaps it’s just my suspicious mind. It is however very, very expensive for the type of film (assuming low production costs) and for the type of suggested motivations I would have expected patient-friendly accessibility and price range. Taking advantage of a disadvantaged and disabled patient community is hopefully NOT the driving force behind the project and hopefully nor is peddling to our NHS the type of drugs that the marketing made mention of. Because M.E., currently becoming recognised and labelled in the U.S. as S.E.I.D. (systemic exertion intolerance disease) is a shape-shifting monster and every individual is unique with some common factors but unique physiological/disease profile. Yet I feel an urgency to watch the film fearful it might not be evenly representative, that it may well be setting or confirming the supposed stereotypes of what severe states of my diagnosed condition are supposed to present as / look like. I’m a council estate kid (s’posedly grown-up now of course) and most of our kind never receive a diagnosis. I don’t consider myself fortunate to have been diagnosed. [bugbare#2] Diagnosis (ie. M.E.) is a blight that excuses medical negligence (such as failure to investigate and diagnose other co-morbid conditions ie. heart attacks and so on, thereby denying access to appropriate medical treatments), social neglect, systematic abuse and discrimination. So, am I looking forward to seeing the film? No. The marketing slant changed and apparently it’s ‘a love story’. I don’t particularly enjoy love stories. But yes, I am looking forward to seeing it so I can give it a fair chance and have the opportunity to form an opinion and perhaps post a review having seen the darned thing! The other dubious quality the film has is being so easily confusable with the horror film of the same name, Unrest, that apparently features real cadavers. ‘S’nuff of that. Such things shouldn’t be allowed. And for the ‘disability-focus’ version of the film I’ll one day maybe see: a look at the lady glammed up for the marketing pertaining to the main ‘real-life’ character, well her ‘look’ reminded me of Cruella daVille in the blockbuster spotty-dogs family film and it just creeps me out the more of the little I see and hear of it. And no way i’m ever leaving MY body to medical science if they gonna let dodgy film-makers do weirdo things like make the horror version of Unrest or whatever other crazy shit some people might do for ‘arts and entertainment’ and whatever.

Anyway. What AM I looking forward to this month?

My birthday! Nothing much will happen. No point making plans. I will enjoy the day as every day, in whatever way I can. (I’ll look forward to completing that poem, although it wasn’t intentional… mental note, to-do). Maybe I’ll trek to the nearest local shop for my pre-pay-lecci-credit and grab myself a small booze-up opportunity. Nothing like feeling well enough to get hammered – and the oxygenation of one’s legs the morning after can feel such a tremendous relief! Nothing else has that effect than alcohol – shame to be too ill to be able to drink the ‘recommended amounts’ as per healthy government guidelines 😉

I’ve had ‘bake a cake’ in the ‘would like to…’ section on my to-do list for what feels like forever while I have all the necessary ingredients and facility… y’know the score… erm, I might’ve given you entirely the wrong impression with that last choice of phrase and the only shit I smell on the rare occasion I walk the streets (meaning of course, being pedestrian) is that dreadfully chemical awful smelling stuff I can only guess is what anyone might mean by ‘spice’. So if I were fortunate enough to come across weed it’ll probably only be my neglected garden amidst a rush of Spring growth. Ah, if only for true medicinal relief to enjoy some gardening! What a godforsaken world/country we live in. I could try pot plants indoors. I’ll look forward to obtaining some compost (this month?) and post some pictures, if I manage to get anything growing. My seeds are reaching or beyond their use by date. Rocket. Lavender. … Not sure they’d all be suitable for indoors… I’ll have to check the packets. Too much wishful thinking and not enough getting around to it!

yeah, right! What is this, new year resolutions? Wrong time of year in spite of new year traditions to attend. I wonder what anyone did to celebrate surviving by this time of year. Well, I’ve not made my gift-giving visits yet and by now, I decided most of what few things I brought for presents wasn’t good enough, and might be lazy and throw a coin at ’em instead. Confession: I ate the chocolate goodies myself thinking they’d expire, then spotted they’d still be good by a while after April Fool’s Day, aka Easter (I just love it when that happens, cultural traditions tells us a lot.) I always feel like celebrating christmas in July when it’s warm and the sun is shining. But christmas is neither here nor there and wholly beside the point.

Getting back to better habits! Blogging habits, of course! I wrote two long posts so far this week at my main blog – you might not want to read it all but you might enjoy skimming to see my pics there. You know where to go for that one maybe, if you so wish…

Snapping! I’m looking forward to playing with more mundane everyday stuff in my artsyness ways with assemblage and photographs of assemblage type just happens to be there – clutter and the like. I like. I do these things for my ‘child-i’ (sorry, that ‘I’ has to be kept small too, otherwise it is entirely incorrect).

We had snow today! It’d be the most wonderful thing if we could just have snow at least all month! I’d so love there to be enough snow to make my mooc-inspired art project as enough snow arriving is crucial to the concept (or rather to the making and realisation of my idea) and I cannot progress nor complete until the weather improves with enough snow. My fencing getting repaired’s waiting on that unlikelihood too. (the weather improving, not snow arriving!) 

Can’t resist sharing a photo from today’s *snowfall* inspired activity:

a used firework, ie. stick and casing, showing the words sky diamonds and juxtaposed with a wall-mounted room thermometer

I know, stupid photo. maybe. But I like it. I captured it during snowfalling. A snap from the stuff that was easily to hand to celebrate while upon my pieds (aka feet, naturally). Against the backgrounds of my living room wall and refrigerator, conveniently placed for psychological warmth of the wall thermometer slightly even though the air in the room will be cold as it increases the reading and even more conveniently placed to save the distance of carrying groceries.

Know anyone who blogs stuff anything like mine? I’d love to read and see some. I suppose I should explain (in case you’re not getting my alt-text input) that , except for ‘found objects’ I don’t have fireworks in the house or garden ever other than other peopl’s used casings, eg. the one pictured: one of several I collected from my yard on firework night, 5th November last year while they were falling around me, once or twice dropping on  my head, as I stood watching those sorts of sparkling *sky diamonds* that other people not ever so closeby in my neighbourhood were sending to the heavens that peculiar evening. I prefer snowfall but don’t get quite as much souvenir value from standing on my yard in only snow, although snow has to be among the most precious material substances on earth. Anyway, rockets hitting me  wasn’t as bad as apples and oranges being lobbed at me one evening while I stood in my front garden. I wasn’t even singing. I too often don’t. Honestly.

Cooking anything at all! I just SO have to look forward to more cooking! Especially as after a two month wait I eventually managed to lift the new small appliance I’d treated myself to for Quimbley (aka Xmas) from out of the box and all the way to the scullery-shed (aka kitchen), ready for use:

a pizza cooking in a halogen air frier and the now empty pizza box standing upright beside it (partial view of both objects)
I had no idea it would be such a blindingly bright light – but otherwise happy with my latest plaything                                                                                                                                                                                 – and that pizza was perfect!

As usual, I’m looking forward to eventually catching up with my family, especially my grandkids, and especially as my new grandson entered our world a tiny few moons ago and I’ve still not got far enough to spend time with any of them. And needing to avoid all their vaccinations is a nuisance too, but so is exposure to ‘attenuated viruses’ anytime my standing in a queue, sitting on a bus, or even living in my own home with no direct or even face to face contact. “Fortunately” I don’t have immune deficiency, but over-active immune function that refuses to switch off is usually no fun either – and I not only sense the different types of causative vaccine but I sometimes perhaps show the small signs of meningitis, mumps, measles… atypical polio is the worst, maybe because I had my first polio vaccine directly on my tongue because I didn’t like sugar lumps (I think they actually contained large amounts of artificial sweeteners during a sugar shortage or something and my Dad had told me two were more than enough for a horse and I should NEVER have more than one sugar cube and having only ever tried one and it making me feel ill when I crunched it I never wanted another. So it’s all my own fault, And I’m rambling again.

I’ll look forward to rambling with less ‘woe is me’ one of these days. Why could I not have been born on any other day than the ‘woe is ME’ day! Never mind. I’ll shake loose and fancy free any ole day of any ole week. Hopefully.

So having filled more than my platter’s worth of ‘have something to look forward to’, and some irrelevant running on again, I’ve just realised that this quick post is now a whole day after – in the space of an hour – and at 1am I still need to get yesterday’s lunch! Then another almost an hour checking for typos and re-jigging and running on a bit extra. doh! So I’d bet my britches you’d be looking forward to my rounding this off as much as I am, if only you stayed the length of my drift this far. I hope you’re not left feeling as though I wasted your time, even if it looks as if I forever waste my own 🙂 If not this month, I’ll look forward to tackling the Daily Post’s revamped writing201 ‘class’, some other month. Online learning activity has been burning me out much too easy and I’m (ahem) giving myself a rest from any for a while.

I’m thinking of making some changes to my blog, such as getting off this theme and trying something different, updating leftover issues and tackling some maintenance. Any improvements you’d like to see here or any reader requests/suggestions?



Monday’s Mundane post (less than 700 words)

Reblogging a reminder to self to leap back to q14, still unanswered in my Leap2020 challenge started way back (Matchmakers Q&A I think it was called) Don’t ask about the forfeit for failing to complete in better time!


I caught sight of a photo post challenge response from Indira’s Blog earlier today and thinking I’d maybe take part, hopped over to check the Mundane Monday Challenge rules. Just my luck that this week has been declared the last week of that challenge, unless volunteer(s) step up to host it. After a whopping 150 weeks hosting the challenge, it is understandable that someone might need to draw a closing line and take some rest from it.

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[Reblog] Spoonerisms and Jackanapes!

While I’m gettin around to getting back to#betterblogging, this was such a fantastic story to both read and to hear being read aloud. Wow! Happy new year, hopefully, for all – doesn’t Time flyby, day or night, hope all are safe, well and contented 🙂 Thanks Anand for recent visiting and a wonderful revisit to your blog (albeit briefly, for now)…

absolutely bunkum!

Zaza: A sitara was playing a sitar. Jackanapes had a fly on his nape and he was a whippersnapper, dipper and dapper. Sanguine sang-froid babies sang Freud songs under porcelain gouache posters. A conniption in an anon, a canon of heroic deeds, needs, reeds, feeds, gingerly steps, jejune firefly, Mayflower, shower.  Jazz.

Logos: Zazz.

Zaza: His sasur asked for a raised ration in a susurration. Ratified conflagration. A national annexure. That proscenium osculation under the weather of bellwether.

Logos: Bomb of aplomb ensconced in the throne of winter balloon.  Functionaries riding frowsy waves of perfunctory glances. 

Zaza: A logician taught tautological logics about logistics to his pupil who were also under the titillating tutelage of a humongous master who disabused them by training them into rhetorics.  Take your own effigy and burn it like you blaspheme gods of reasons and then thy spirit of reason will bear fruits in due…

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#13wordstory for prompt ‘Cold Autumn’

Betwixt brollying gas-driven clouds shimmying out sunlights’ dazzles, bedraggling rain now falls temporary.


#skywatch 17:12[BST] or 16:12GMT/cUt yesterday evening Friday 3rd Nov, 2017

earlier this morning, stepping out into light cool rainfall for fresh air check

I made this post as a response to the 13wordstory posted by Sir Tonix at BW.

monthly look ahead – MLA October 2017 – late again innit

screenshot of my poem, link to post in text

Oh dear, i hope a poem attesting to ‘…while no king – no patriarchy – …’ doesn’t appear anti-establishment/anti-royal-family! It’s so deeply concerning, the prejudices we all encounter online moreso these days than ever. Words (and opinions) are not meant to be concrete, they are virtual and shape-shifting…

I’d just copied my original poem from my word-processing screen to post online when an external copier appears to have attempted to snatch a copy too, the selection froze highlighting that section of the last few lines. I posted my poem at my other (main) blog. I call it my main blog because it’s my blog using my proper name. But i blog all over the place here at wordpress (in and on my own account).

I would have been meeting the challenge in better time for MLA, but…

… well, that’s the way of the world isn’t it. Apols that not capitalising my ‘i’ to ‘I’ is annoying for some readers. I’m just plain lazy. In that respect – not entirely no – we were cultured to remember our unimportance in the grand scheme of things here in little england. Nothingham city, to be precise.

So, I can’t remember what on earth was i going to fill this post out with for this month.

Maybe i’ll just leave it here, and think ‘that’ll do’ nicely 🙂

I finally got to see and appreciate on you tube the trailer for a film-documentary ‘everyone’s raving about …’ thanks to this tweet to somewhere to find a springboard link from:

I do want to see the ‘Unrest’ film but it’s inaccessible to most people with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis and raises plenty of concerns regarding the nightmare that is ‘chronic fatigue strategy’ and the ways the problems of disabling illness for people with M.E. have been whitewashed by the CFS campaign and the funding intended for a specific defined patient population has been usurped and misappropriated.

Ironically, ‘Unrest’ is also the title of a 2006 horror film. Now why could i see that for free on youtube but not the american documentary of a lady with an (assuming) undiagnosed neurological stroke type condition, with or without encephalopathy by what little i’ve seen, heard, or read about the reality of the disabling effects and impacts of her ‘chronic fatigue syndrome’ that appears anything but M.E., although probably/possible similar in many ways. And it’s not nice when you know you have a diagnosis proven by verifiable clinical scientific practise (i.e., M.E.) that other people with M.E. might think or say ‘no you don’t’ or ‘I can’t see how…’ and that ‘scientifically-proven’ is misrepresented as scientifically impossible even after research findings based on your blood have been classified by the british government! But possibly that lady’s neuro-condition whether M.E.type illness (in which case she wouldn’t have a chronic fatigue syndrome diagnosis if she were living in my country), but her condition might be treatable with potential stabilising nutrients such as coQ10 or other medicinal products. It’s one way the CFS developments are dangerous for all people with disabling health conditions all around the world! A ready-made way to deny treatment protocols via what appears to be credible evidence based practise founded in what appears to be deliberate corruption and bias! 

I wonder how many British people knew that footage of them might be included in a screening of this nature when they shared time in online video discussions and maybe that’s why the full length documentary isn’t accessible to the British/world M.E. community – and we’re assumed to be a priveleged lot of elitist white people with nothing much wrong with us in comparison to other folk in the world with what are perceived to be far more ‘serious and severe’ disease processes. I know I did not take part. But I would like to be able to access the entire presentation even though CFS is not M.E. – a lot of people are duped into thinking it is, because of misinformation.

It’s interesting to realise that yes, the FedEx talk everyone was raving about is staged and phoney in the presentation of an actress, maybe a relative of the documentary subject/creator acting as an assistant – it’s not the same person’s experience and that lady having a ‘stand-in’ present her talk explains that incongruity issue of it being so difficult to believe when i was watching and listening a little enough – i read the whole of the transcript and it doesn’t read as anything similar to Myalgic Encephalomyelitis barely at all – but the ‘chronic fatigue’ type experience of a distinct diagnosable but undiagnosed neurological condition meeting the ‘CFS’ descriptors enough that had little about it that might truly reflect the collective realities of M.E. patients who continue to experience further harm and neglect as a result of this nightmare CFS situation. The neglect we experienced before was less harmful and less impacting than since this thing started that the world seems to believe is helping us.

So now bio-medical research funding increases will continue to research anything other than Myalgic Encephalomyelitis because CFS funded services EXCLUDES anyone with confirmed, clinically proven M.E. and anyone with any other lifelong disability BECAUSE the CFS strategy is KNOWN to be potentially dangerous for such patient categories!

And gawd, i would much rather be doing anything else than looking like i’ve nothing better to spend my time and limited energy thinking about than ‘oh, poor ME!’

oops, apols if it reads as some Angry Bird sucking too much seedy-fruitcake 🙂 I do hope I’ve no caused offence. Best wishes all! Thank goodness Friday13th is over with…

Late again (MLA)

it may be grey and miserable, using the lower case i as a lower caste english person of no caste and no class system in British culture of my near fifty years… the high and mighty here made sure the majority recognise their shows of ‘no class’… but anyway, a break in the hot sunny weather we had for a week or so in April and again toward the end of May, would be nicer if it wasn’t quite as chilly. Not many nice days for going out with particle activity in the air too often and feeling coastal ionisation in the midlands is a bit unsettling too.

Dread to think what must be going on in other realities. Maybe it’s just nature and I’m completely barmey for ever wondering on anything.

I hadn’t planned a ‘hiatus’ but for April I was planning a post to say, I need a rest. Not been blogging properly for ages anyway. Guess it shows. Hopelessness.

Anyway, hopefully, now I’ve felt like enjoying some music and noise-making again, devising geriatric keepfit practise in my kitchen, jigging along, nearly keeping up with the washing-up and not really worrying about anything too much.

Political representation all stood down so there’ll be some celebrations in retirement and enjoyment of life then, hopefully. The whitewash that follows could be nobody’s business. Hang on, I’m just putting ‘Anarchy for the UK’ on for a listen, 4:40am, Japanese walls, gotta keep it quiet…

can’t find it, probably not blog if I put that on… Meat Puppets instead, Forbidden Places…

yeah, right, flippin’ CD player reads like I have to have authorisation and current displays ‘no disc’… funny thing is that ghetto blaster hadn’t worked for discs in ages, till I went to the shop once a few months back. Now the usual tinpot kitchen player got trashed for CDs and this old one magically worked again. Maybe just needed a nice long rest. So, old ‘pirate’ tape (archival back-up) with Chemical Brothes, ‘Dig Your Own Hole’.

We could find ourselves suddenly awakening to an elitist world of traumatised indignants for whom we have no contextual understanding of why our clumsy classless Englishness is so bloody offensive to still be allowed our own freedoms of expression.

Because we might have had a slither of factual news here and there but we had a couple of ‘news blackout’ times here and there too. Just news washes away so fast and can easily be replicated or filled with ‘convincers’. So who the hell knows what’s round the corner. I’m paying no attention to media. Obviously. Most of the time. Fave local radio on – in the next room -but their transmission keeps going down occasionally – maybe can’t afford 24 hours and people get ill or stuck in traffic so don’t assume no broadcast is blackout, tech issues. Interference.

So i’m looking forward to a little bit of spring-cleaning and maybe painting the alcoves in the living room – I bought enough paint when I moved in five years ago. Would be nice to get round to that. Matches the chimney breast’s old ‘Khan’ style (BBC sitcom) wallpaper only there’s was yellow mine’s not. It might be July before I get round to it. I’m already late. June!

B52s on archive mp3 somewhere to hand – June Bug and a jitter along jotting… if i can’t find that an old Talking Heads tape and Road to Nowhere etc will have to suffice. Cardiacs ‘the Whole Window’ when the disc player co-operates.

I do know i should use a semi-colon in lists. But preferred the full stop. Period.

Any way, i disrupted listing.

If I were going to the cinema I might like to see the new movie with judi dench as Queen Victoria. But there was a youtube ad for a psychological thriller about disappearing people that looked fascinatingfor both storyline and cinematic effects. Dunno that the adrenalin would be good for me so a cinema would be the best place to see that. Can’t remember the title. Knowing me I’ll arrive at one and decide to watch whatever the kids animation is. Last film i saw at the cinema was ‘How to train a Dragon, it was fantastic. Glenn Miller Story on youtube was a fab find a few months ago. i tend to find myself always not really having any leisurely time at home, in spite of my obvious laziness of lifestyle. Restless.

I could look forward to planning a trip to the seaside.

February is the best time for a day at the beach on any day the fish and chip stop still opens. But I might plan a day out anyway. And a day away.

I’d look forward to good news but should know better. So I look forward to ignoring whatever it is and try to live with more gratitude and try and make some progress.

Work in progress. I look forward to three lingering assignments to complete and some really excellent reading opportunities, even if I only get as far as extracts and passages. Currently reading ‘Under the Sleepless Mountain’ by Parijat – the English translation maybe misses the beauty of the original language. I might have to look for an audio book in the original language so I can hear it. I don’t mind not understanding. There is still so much you can experience in listening to language. And I will already have some familiarity with the story. I’ll have to pencil-in a window-shopping at Amazon day for that.

I bought a couple of Cid Corman books – one of short essays and one of poems. Got as far as the end of chapter one in reading Stephen Fry’s ‘The Ode Less Travelled’. Iambic pentameter is a stumbling block. Until I can do that excercise, I am going no further. There’s alot of poems I want to look up now he’s pointed to  them. We didn’t learn poetry in that formal classical style when we were schooled in state education. We learnt natural poetry. It’s not that it’s easier – but it makes it very difficult to learn the antiquated style. It gets traumatic though realising the origins and corruptions of language and the historical happenings are nightmarish.Perhaps that’s why.

Looking forward to learning more, contextually, about differing styles and forms of international english and finding my concerns about global pressures to standardise our native language to AmEn style are impossible to achieve when region to region we all value our natural language and prefer to respectfully uphold cultural rights and traditions of all. Wishful thinking.


Need to get on. Looking forward to being in better time with MLA next time. And maybe getting back to… Cheers (and Soap!)






Monthly Look Ahead