#13wordstory for prompt ‘Cold Autumn’

Betwixt brollying gas-driven clouds¬†shimmying out sunlights’ dazzles, bedraggling rain now falls temporary.

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#skywatch 17:12[BST] or 16:12GMT/cUt yesterday evening Friday 3rd Nov, 2017

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earlier this morning, stepping out into light cool rainfall for fresh air check

I made this post as a response to the 13wordstory posted by Sir Tonix at BW.

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monthly look ahead – MLA October 2017 – late again innit

screenshot of my poem, link to post in text

Oh dear, i hope a poem attesting to ‘…while no king – no patriarchy – …’ doesn’t appear anti-establishment/anti-royal-family! It’s so deeply concerning, the prejudices we all encounter online moreso these days than ever. Words (and opinions) are not meant to be concrete, they are virtual and shape-shifting…

I’d just copied my original poem from my word-processing screen to post online when an external copier appears to have attempted to snatch a copy too, the selection froze highlighting that section of the last few lines. I posted my poem at my other (main) blog. I call it my main blog because it’s my blog using my proper name. But i blog all over the place here at wordpress (in and on my own account).

I would have been meeting the challenge in better time for MLA, but…

… well, that’s the way of the world isn’t it. Apols that not capitalising my ‘i’ to ‘I’ is annoying for some readers. I’m just plain lazy. In that respect – not entirely no – we were cultured to remember our unimportance in the grand scheme of things here in little england. Nothingham city, to be precise.

So, I can’t remember what on earth was i going to fill this post out with for this month.

Maybe i’ll just leave it here, and think ‘that’ll do’ nicely ūüôā

I finally got to see and appreciate on you tube the trailer for a film-documentary ‘everyone’s raving about …’ thanks to this tweet to somewhere to find a springboard link from:

I do want to see the ‘Unrest’ film but it’s inaccessible to most people with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis and raises plenty of concerns regarding the nightmare that is ‘chronic fatigue strategy’ and the ways the problems of disabling illness for people with M.E. have been whitewashed by the CFS campaign and the funding intended for a specific defined patient population has been usurped and misappropriated.

Ironically, ‘Unrest’ is also the title of a 2006 horror film. Now why could i see that for free on youtube but not the american documentary of a lady with an (assuming) undiagnosed neurological stroke type condition, with or without encephalopathy by what little i’ve seen, heard, or read about the reality of the disabling effects and impacts of her ‘chronic fatigue syndrome’ that appears anything but M.E., although probably/possible similar in many ways. And it’s not nice when you know you have a diagnosis proven by verifiable clinical scientific practise (i.e., M.E.) that other people with M.E. might think or say ‘no you don’t’ or ‘I can’t see how…’ and that ‘scientifically-proven’ is misrepresented as scientifically impossible even after research findings based on your blood have been classified by the british government! But possibly that lady’s neuro-condition whether M.E.type illness (in which case she wouldn’t have a chronic fatigue syndrome diagnosis if she were living in my country), but her condition¬†might be treatable with potential stabilising nutrients such as coQ10 or other medicinal products. It’s one way the CFS developments are dangerous¬†for all people with disabling health conditions all around the world!¬†A ready-made way to deny treatment protocols via what appears to be credible evidence based practise founded in what appears to be deliberate corruption and bias!¬†

I wonder how many British people knew that footage of them might be included in a screening of this nature when they shared time in online video discussions and maybe that’s why the full length documentary isn’t accessible to the British/world M.E. community –¬†and¬†we’re assumed to be a priveleged lot of elitist white people with nothing much wrong with us in comparison to¬†other folk in the world with what are perceived to be far more ‘serious and severe’ disease processes. I know I did not take part. But I would like to be able to access the entire presentation even though CFS is not M.E. – a lot of people are duped into thinking it is, because of misinformation.

It’s interesting to realise that yes, the FedEx talk everyone was raving about is staged and phoney in the presentation of an actress, maybe a relative of the documentary subject/creator acting as an assistant – it’s not the same person’s experience and that lady having a ‘stand-in’ present her talk explains that incongruity issue of it being so difficult to believe when i was watching and listening a little enough – i read the whole of the transcript and it doesn’t read as anything similar to Myalgic Encephalomyelitis barely at all – but the ‘chronic fatigue’ type experience of a distinct diagnosable but undiagnosed neurological condition meeting the ‘CFS’ descriptors enough that had little about it that might truly reflect the collective realities of M.E. patients who continue to experience further harm and neglect as a result of this nightmare CFS situation. The neglect we experienced before was less harmful and less impacting than since this thing started that the world seems to believe is helping us.

So now bio-medical research funding increases will continue to research anything other than Myalgic Encephalomyelitis because CFS funded services EXCLUDES anyone with confirmed, clinically proven M.E. and anyone with any other lifelong disability BECAUSE the CFS strategy is KNOWN to be potentially dangerous for such patient categories!

And gawd, i would much rather be doing anything else than looking like i’ve nothing better to spend my time and limited energy thinking about than ‘oh, poor ME!’

oops, apols if it reads as some Angry Bird sucking too much seedy-fruitcake ūüôā I do hope I’ve no caused offence. Best wishes all!¬†Thank goodness Friday13th is over with…

Late again (MLA)

it may be grey and miserable, using the lower case i as a lower caste english person of no caste and no class system in British culture of my near fifty years… the high and mighty here made sure the majority recognise their shows of ‘no class’… but anyway, a break in the hot sunny weather we had for a week or so in April and again toward the end of May, would be nicer if it wasn’t quite as chilly. Not many nice days for going out with particle activity in the air too often and feeling coastal ionisation in the midlands is a bit unsettling too.

Dread to think what must be going on in other realities. Maybe it’s just nature and I’m completely barmey for ever wondering on anything.

I hadn’t planned a ‘hiatus’ but for April I was planning a post to say, I need a rest. Not been blogging properly for ages anyway. Guess it shows. Hopelessness.

Anyway, hopefully, now I’ve felt like enjoying some music and noise-making again, devising geriatric keepfit practise in my kitchen, jigging along, nearly keeping up with the washing-up and not really worrying about anything too much.

Political representation all stood down so there’ll be some celebrations in retirement and enjoyment of life then, hopefully. The whitewash that follows could be nobody’s business. Hang on, I’m just putting ‘Anarchy for the UK’ on for a listen, 4:40am, Japanese walls, gotta keep it quiet…

can’t find it, probably not blog if I put that on… Meat¬†Puppets instead, Forbidden Places…

yeah, right, flippin’ CD player reads like I have to have authorisation and current displays ‘no disc’… funny thing is that ghetto blaster hadn’t worked for discs in ages, till I went to the shop once a few months back. Now the usual tinpot kitchen player got trashed for CDs and this old one magically worked again. Maybe just needed a nice long rest. So, old ‘pirate’ tape (archival back-up) with Chemical Brothes, ‘Dig Your Own Hole’.

We could find ourselves suddenly awakening to an elitist world of traumatised indignants for whom we have no contextual understanding of why our clumsy classless Englishness is so bloody offensive to still be allowed our own freedoms of expression.

Because we might have had a slither of factual news here and there but we had a couple of ‘news blackout’ times here and there too. Just news washes away so fast and can easily be replicated or filled with ‘convincers’. So who the hell knows what’s round the corner. I’m paying no attention to media. Obviously. Most of the time. Fave local radio on – in the next room -but their transmission keeps going down occasionally – maybe can’t afford 24 hours and people get ill or stuck in traffic so don’t assume no broadcast is blackout, tech issues. Interference.

So i’m looking forward to a little bit of spring-cleaning and maybe painting the alcoves in the living room – I bought enough paint when I moved in five years ago. Would be nice to get round to that. Matches the chimney breast’s old ‘Khan’ style (BBC sitcom) wallpaper only there’s was yellow mine’s not. It might be July before I get round to it. I’m already late. June!

B52s on archive mp3 somewhere to hand – June Bug and a jitter along jotting… if i can’t find that an old Talking Heads tape and Road to Nowhere etc will have to suffice. Cardiacs ‘the Whole Window’ when the disc player co-operates.

I do know i should use a semi-colon in lists. But preferred the full stop. Period.

Any way, i disrupted listing.

If I were going to the cinema I might like to see the new movie with judi dench as Queen Victoria. But there was a youtube ad for a psychological thriller about disappearing people that looked fascinatingfor both storyline and cinematic effects. Dunno that the adrenalin would be good for me so a cinema would be the best place to see that. Can’t remember the title. Knowing me I’ll arrive at one and decide to watch whatever the kids animation is. Last film i saw at the cinema was ‘How to train a Dragon, it was fantastic. Glenn Miller Story on youtube was a fab find a few months ago. i tend to find myself always not really having any leisurely time at home, in spite of my obvious laziness of lifestyle. Restless.

I could look forward to planning a trip to the seaside.

February is the best time for a day at the beach on any day the fish and chip stop still opens. But I might plan a day out anyway. And a day away.

I’d look forward to good news but should know better. So I look forward to ignoring whatever it is and try to live with more gratitude and try and make some progress.

Work in progress. I look forward to three lingering assignments to complete and some really excellent reading opportunities, even if I only get as far as extracts and passages. Currently reading ‘Under the Sleepless Mountain’ by Parijat – the English translation maybe misses the beauty of the original language. I might have to look for an audio book in the original language so I can hear it. I don’t mind not understanding. There is still so much you can experience in listening to language. And I will already have some familiarity with the story. I’ll have to pencil-in a window-shopping at Amazon day for that.

I bought a couple of Cid Corman books – one of short essays and one of poems. Got as far as the end of chapter one in reading Stephen Fry’s ‘The Ode Less Travelled’. Iambic pentameter is a stumbling block. Until I can do that excercise, I am going no further. There’s alot of poems I want to look up now he’s pointed to ¬†them. We didn’t learn poetry in that formal classical style when we were schooled in state education. We learnt natural poetry. It’s not that it’s easier –¬†but it makes it very difficult to learn the antiquated style. It gets traumatic though realising the origins and corruptions of language and the historical happenings are nightmarish.Perhaps that’s why.

Looking forward to learning more, contextually, about differing styles and forms of international english and finding my concerns about global pressures to standardise our native language to AmEn style are impossible to achieve when region to region we all value our natural language and prefer to respectfully uphold cultural rights and traditions of all. Wishful thinking.

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Need to get on. Looking forward to being in better time with MLA next time. And maybe getting back to… Cheers (and Soap!)

 

 

 

 

 

Monthly Look Ahead

Source: Seasons…. Writing

Hey it’s really nice to see a spring in someone’s step and stepping into sunshine or snow sending love and good wishes and hopefully so… it’s really nice meeting real nice blogging neighbours in this wonderful virtual world here at WordPress! i dunno about you guys but I love it here (WordPress generally, I don’t mean ‘at my blog’! BUT I haven’t been getting around and about as much as I would have liked BUT I know you don’t mind cos isn’t it nice sometimes to get a bit of peace and quiet and taking time with other peeps ūüôā

So, wherever you are in the world, hopefully that’s not in floods, wading through waste-water’s no fun… and thankfully here, I’m not, but some may have been, but this lunchtime, the sun is shining and the weather is fine. ¬†(is this post too long for a ‘status’ format?)

I love Sarah’s blog(s) and the co-learning encouragement and virtual coffees and that’s a great Springy post I thought I’d share while saying thanks to you all who drop by here and there too ūüôā #blogging101 was fun trailing through july and august in our own time and at a comfy pace but 2015 was an age ago now! Y’all planning a two-year(or-plus) reunion splash post for virtual summer fun? Or we missed your earlier classes blogging celebratory posts already…? Anyone ready to help us save Blogger’s World somehow, stop it slip sliding away while Anand, Rashmi, K. and all the others who puts so much effort in early on and along the way – is your commenting or author level access even working there? Today’s theme is sposed to be ‘tuesday trivia’ if anyone’s up to posting to it, do it! Be nice to see some returning community spirit but ‘we gotta figh,.. for the right,.. to p-a-r-t-y…’ as the Beastie Boys would lead us to believe! #everydayinspiration (hook’em wivvaquote’ll never work, will it???)

 

Marching on – it’s MLA time again!

Here we are again as Monthly Look Ahead flies round so soon…

…and there’s much to look forward to these next few weeks. I’ll be another whole year older by the end of the month – and glad that doesn’t happen every month.¬†Whether I’ll be any the wiser for my older age remains to be seen, but I’d hedge my bets toward ‘most unlikely’.¬†

As usual there’s ongoing blogging goals. I can’t be bothered to think about them much just now, kind of mapped out already and more of the same ole same ole and lots of lingering to-do’s. ¬†I don’t know how long this ‘blogging my way back to life somehow’ might take, but I’ll get there, wherever ‘there’ might be. Maybe I just need more determination (to get a life, not to blog! LOL). This month I’m still¬†looking to get my blogging house in order and retaking the BloggingU customisation and everyday-inspiration ‘courses’, but not from here and hopefully not in my usual scatterbrained here, there and everywhere ways…

I’ll be carrying on my appreciation of Cid Corman and delving into getting to know Frank O’Hara’s poetry better. Hopefully I’ll be immersing ¬†with reading and experiencing poetry aplenty, learning some more about more poets and maybe even trying to write some more poems myself too. Maybe it’ll help me drag myself into being more creative in other ways too, like getting a daily drawing routine going – it’s been a failing goal for much too long. I definitely could use some better therapeutic activity time and a lot more often.

Somewhere to hand I’ve some packets of flower seeds that should still be good for sowing. Increasing exposure to natural daylight and more outdoor fresh air would be a very good idea. Fairweather gardening¬†might¬†be do-able in small bursts, providing winter doesn’t strike with avengeance. Even if it does, there should be some window for gardening type enjoyment and¬†the fencing really needs patching and propping up more sufficiently.

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This panel doesn’t really need my shadow to prop it up, unlike other parts in need of more than my shadow…

Although I’ve not yet made it onto the bouncerciser at all yet, nor my wii-fit,¬†and¬†even though excercise can be counterproductive¬†they are at least available if ever I feel up to some. I live in hope. I used to love walking, just getting anywhere at all under your own steam, but my capacity and tolerance has been reducing year on year for the last eight years. It’s quite concerning to now, or still, be at this current stage and on the one hand seems totally unrealistic to be even thinking about excercise and on the other hand seems totally defeatist not to be. I’m managing up and down the stairs a bit better again – and quite often in comparison to a while ago. So, being grateful for small mercies…

I’ve been managing to eat more regularly without cooking much as such¬†and have restarted co-enzymeQ10 supplements. They’re no good without good food enough and food’s not much good with insufficient enzyme production. So keeping up with food and nutrition and making sure to enjoy food is definitely on the menu again. Washing up may be off the cards most days of the week but I’m making sure not to make much of it by labour-saving strategies¬†and by letting it wait around looking like still life. I even got photos to prove it but I’m not sharing those here and now. I might draw from them when I’ve washed up forgetting to get round to drawing any beforehand.

Anything else besides will be an added and appreciated bonus and be bound to get a mention – I almost forgot to add that I’ve managed quite a lot of reading books for pleasure these last few weeks. That makes a nice change. I’m quite enjoying reading Scott Nicholson’s post-apocalyptic ‘After’ series, they’re quite an easy read and very more-ish; I already finished the four books of his that I bought and so need to buy more – or find a better way of getting kindle books and ending my boycott, cos kindle versions are loads cheaper as well as having the environmental advantage and the instant delivery. Yet a real book will still work for very much longer than any gadget and there’s nothing quite like turning a page.

I haven’t forgotten my family, honestly, even if it’s not what it looks like; we’re quite long overdue for a visit but will get around to it eventually, one of these days…

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Monthly Look Ahead event hosted by Coolbeans4, visit their post for March here

 

Farewell February, onward March!

This was the scene beyond my backyard, on yesterday’s last morning of February…

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… and two days ago I spotted these two tiny snowdrops finally making their annual emergence and remembered to capture this somewhat hasty and poorly composed snap of them while outside with my camera to hand…

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Maybe this year I’ll manage something better with the garden! I used to love gardening but for all sorts of reasons I haven’t managed any here enough. These bulbs were brought with me from my previous garden at the family home I left behind. Nothing else survived beyond the first year. Bordering a country park and nature reserve type area there are creatures like moles around and my gardens shown signs of molehills for a few months now, so I wonder if the bulbs get eaten perhaps – or maybe there’s just too much shade and damp.

Here in the Midlands we haven’t really had winter so far, although it was cold today and there had been warnings of ice to look out for, though no sign of any by the time I got myself outside. Until ‘storm Doris’ hit last week – ripping my fences to shreds some more – winter has seemed unusually and eerily quiet and the skies have all too often been jewel shades of blue. I haven’t kept a sky-watch as much as I’d hoped for being quite out of sorts, as is embarrassingly obvious when looking back at my scatty ranting posts(!) Never mind, could be worse and¬†if March winds doth blow, we could still soon have snow¬†comes to mind, (but apparently that rhyme should be ‘The North wind doth blow…’¬†it’s just not how I remember it).Really, it should be daffodils making an appearance, given that ¬†I did buy some daff-bulbs for this garden once upon a time¬†and¬†as it’s St. David’s Day… but two tiny snowdrops are better than none at all and will have to suffice for now. Maybe next year’s spring garden will be blooming lovelier… in the meantime, Happy March onward, hopefully ūüôā

 

The Memory of the Thing Is (2)

I’m not having a lot of luck over on my blog in the Sketch theme and for some reason the ether ate my photo of a drawing I made yesterday and tried to share there this morning, along with a poem. I’ve put that on Facebook in order to try sharing it with the mooc community as it was a response to an excercise. I liked it better in the purple font I drafted it with, but had typed it into notepad then pasted it over to get the line spacing how it needed to be and my dashboard locked down and I had another stressy wasted day trying to resolve whatever in my settings was making stuff weird again.

You might not want to read it on Facebook, or at all, but here it is again.

Or it was. And now its gone. What IS going on at WordPress? Did I slip on my mobile phone screen while trying to post? I have lots of problems using this although I have managed a small few times. Oh well. Another post losing MY content! I’ll get my poem on here sometime when something works. Its at my public personal facebook (colette.bates.58) not to mix me up with my virtual volunteer. Cuz. Tho I’m mixing me up fine all by myself! It opens fine in the window ¬†there above.

I got stupidly overly concerned that it (post prevention and photo-uploads vanishing) was some kind of political overanxious control from the totalitarian DTrumpUS freakystuff that our media-hype is leading us to maybe believe. As if there could be a yankeetakeover of the UK – the good women of nearNotts with their potato mashers are enough to scare off any threat, so legend has it!

I’m wondering if I should bother with much else if it’s going to be shoddy at this draughty old run-down station. There are holes all over this platform. Is it some silly bitches’ stilettoes? They tend to be ruinous with all kinds of floors!